By Vera Joffe, Ph.D.

Dear Readersl,

I have written about many different topics of daily life, and a few articles about psychological themes.

Today I would like to talk to you about a very important issue: “When to use psychological terms” in describing family members, your children, and other people you know.

I was in a party this week, and I had conversations with several people. When describing their families, they talked about how “dysfunctional” their parents were, how “codependent” their ex-spouses were, and how they had children with “ADD” and how their cousins had “ocd”.

It is very important to the meaning of words when one uses them. To say that you come from a “dysfunctional” family: What does that mean? How about “ocd”? The abbreviation is for “obsessive-compulsive disorder”. When I asked one person what made him think that his cousin had “ocd”. He said: “He has the same routine every day, and he is impeccable with his clothes, and he is very neat.” I asked this person: “Is your cousin’s life impaired, and very affected by those habits that you just described to me?” He said: “No. Actually, my cousin is a very happy person, he is just “neurotic” about certain things.” (This person did not even noticehe had used another psychological term without knowing the real meaning of it…).

In order for someone to qualify for any type of psychiatric diagnosis, he/she has to experience impairment in his/her life due to the symptoms. The degree of impairment that one experiences with symptoms of obsessive and compulsive behaviors is determined by the person who, in turn, will decided if help is needed. Then, the professional in the mental health field will determine if the person qualifies for the diagnosis of a mental disorder, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder.

I wrote about depression a while ago. All people experience feelings of helplessness, and hopelessness. The reasons for those feelings, and how long they last, and how pervasive they are will determine if the person needs help in dealing with those feelings.

Another area that brings a lot of discussion and criticism is the one of Attention Deficit Disorder, or ADHD. I wrote in this column a while ago about the correct way to diagnose and treat ADHD. I continue to hear people talking freely about ADHD such as this case of an adult stating: “I think my boss has ADHD. He can’t stop moving in the office the whole day”. I also receive calls from parents stating that their child’s teacher and caretaker told them that their child has ADHD. It is imperative to know that only a physician or a psychologist can diagnose a child with ADHD. There are other mental health professionals who are also knowledgeable in the area, and they may help in the diagnosis of ADHD, such as some social workers who work for the school system.

Whenever you have questions about possible need for treatment for daily behavior problems (or mood, such as depression), consult your primary physician, or the pediatrician (in case of children). The physicians will direct you to the correct professional if they believe that you have enough symptoms to justify a more detailed diagnosis and treatment delivered by a psychiatrist, neurologist, psychologist, or other mental health professional.

Do not let anyone “diagnose” yourself or your children. Do not let a neighbor who does not have professional background in mental health nor in medicine diagnose your child with “autism” (as I have witnessed a couple of times happening in my community). You may wish to listen to people’s observations, and sometimes advise, but remind yourselves that you would never have surgery in your knee under the recommendation of a close friend. The same goes for mental health diagnosis and treatment: Look for help from reliable and professional sources.

Finally, the Internet can help many people with good information about any topic in medicine and mental health. However, there are some sources that are biased, and not based on solid research. If you want any information about mental health, please, go to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), and the National Institute of Health (NIH) addresses in the Internet.